Former Homo is site for ex gay person, we are indivisuals who have left the Gay lifestlye. I was a lesbian for over 10 years I am now straight. I am not A Christian but a Buddhist. I say that becuse most people think I was a right wing christian, but I am not I am not even very religous. This is my story and I wish to share more with you.

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Location: Boston, Mass, United States

Tuesday, August 10, 2004

Why are people Gay?

Why are people gay or lesbian? In other words, why do some people experience same-sex attraction?

There are different ideas about why some people experience same-sex attraction:

Many same-sex-attracted people have a sense of being "different" from a very early age and consequently they believe that they were "born gay." Sometimes news magazines have even made it sound like scientists have found genetic proof. So far, there is no proof that this is really true. A person who reads what scientists themselves have written will see that the research does not lead to the conclusion that people are born gay.

In fact Parents, Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG), one of the larger pro-gay organizations, explains that there is no conclusive evidence that people are born gay in its booklet "Why Ask Why? Addressing the Research on Homosexuality and Biology."

Are people born gay? Read about the three studies that have gotten the most attention -- Simon LeVay and brain structure, Bailey & Pillard and their twin study, and Hamer's genetic markers study.

Other people believe that some people are gay because they chose to be gay. For most gay people, this is not true. They did not wake up one morning and say to themselves, "Well, so far in my life I've been straight; from now on I think I am going to be gay." The direction of our attractions is not something that we can quickly change, like switching a light on and off.

Of course, whether gay or straight, we always have a choice about what we do -- whether and how we act on our feelings and desires. Just because we feel like doing something, doesn't mean we are compelled to do it. As well, those who experience same-sex attraction can choose whether or not they wish to identify themselves with a label like "gay" or "lesbian."

Others believe that some people are gay because of what happened to them during their life. They may have been hurt emotionally and it may affect the way they feel about themselves. They may have been sexually abused or had a broken relationship with one or both of their parents. (From our work with people who want to leave homosexuality, we know that many have experienced one or both of these. Of course, not everyone who has been sexually abused or who has had a bad relationship with a parent is attracted to the same sex. And not everyone who is attracted to the same sex has been sexually abused.) Over time -- and depending on the help they were given for working through difficult things that happened to them, what other negative events they experienced, the choices they made in response, and so on -- they became attracted to people of the same sex. This process is sometimes called "environmental," "developmental" or "nurture rather than nature."

Are some people gay because of what happened in their life? Read some personal stories.

Generally, it seems that there are a number of different factors which are of different degrees of importance in different people's lives. These can include:

factors that you're born with (for example, temperament or possible genetic predisposition)
whether there were other significant negative experiences in childhood (for example, sexual abuse, or rejection by peers),
whether a person's family situation was good or bad,
the amount and kind of support that was available to help the child or young person deal with what was happening,
the kind of moral training a child received,
the choices that were made in response to feelings and attractions,
how clear or confused gender roles are in a particular culture,


Blogger Gervasio Martos said...

Me parece absurdo,yo soy homosexual,es una opción natural,y soy estudiante de filosofía. Pienso que cada uno tiene su preferencia sexual y que nergar esta tendencia es antinatural,como la religión budista tuya,un artificio humano. No entiendo por qué va a ser malo se homosexual,dimelo tú,chica absurda y aberrante,hiriente.

3:07 PM  

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